Weigh-In | 1.24.11

I hate these posts.  Not the weigh-ins.  The weigh-ins when I'm UP.  Even more than that, I hate the weigh-ins when I'm up....and it doesn't make sense.

I'm up 1.4 lbs today.  I was seriously shocked when I stepped on the scale this morning!  Yesterday, I was DOWN almost 2 lbs!!!  I mean, don't get me wrong, I have some theories on this - but, I don't know have a real reason.  To list a few - muscle gain, sodium, TOTM? 

It's a little disheartening to know that I worked out SO hard and didn't enjoy a loss!  Seriously, I logged 374 minutes of exercise this week.  My goal is 210 per week.  I also burned 4462 calories (how many calories is in a pound? Huh?  Huh?).  My goal is 1950!  I ate pretty well this week.  There is always room for improvement, but, I really did well! 

Ok...scrap that.  First off, I know that in the next week or so, I'm most likely going to enjoy a bigger loss than usual.  Darn that delayed gratification!!!!  So many emotions come out when stuff like this happens.  Weight-loss is a mystery....it doesn't always happen the way we think it should.  I must dust myself off, lace up those running shoes and get moving again this week.  The same way I would if the scale had shown a loss. 

God has been speaking to me a lot lately about this weight-loss journey I'm on.  I know beyond a shadow of a doubt, that He is helping me.  I've given this all to Him.  Yesterday, during worship at church, a song we sang spoke to my heart.  It has many meanings to me, and I'm going to share some lyrics here: 

Healer

by Hillsong

You hold my every moment
You calm my raging seas
You walk with me through fire
And heal all my disease

I trust in You
I trust in You

I believe You're my Healer
I believe You are all I need
I believe You're my Portion
I believe You're more than enough for me
Jesus You're all I need

Nothing is impossible for You
Nothing is impossible for You
Nothing is impossible for You
You hold my world in Your hands

Yesterday I just cried out and sang this from the bottom of my heart.  I really feel that obesity is a disease.  God is going to heal me of it!  I feel it!  I know with every fiber of my being that I will be freed of this!  We may at times feel like things are impossible for us, but as this song says, nothing...NOTHING is impossible for Him!  I'm so grateful that when it comes down to it, my biggest "cheerleader" in this, is God.  I have felt Him pushing me...rooting me on lately.  It's an amazing feeling!  I have to do my part, though.  That means picking myself up today and moving!  It means eating as well as I can possibly manage!

You know, I have to thank every one of you who are reading.  I see my stats and know that people are reading.  I'm so happy you're all here!  I see supportive comments and they help me so much!  Thank you all!  They really make my day and keep me going!  This blog has been one of the best things I've ever done in dealing with weight-loss.

Well, today is a new day, in a brand-new week!  Wish me luck!

Jo



Weigh-In | 10.14.10

So...guess what?!  I'm amazed!  After some *pretty* careful eating the last couple of days, a great workout (finally) last night.... I'm DOWN 1.8!!!  Seriously?!  I was so stinkin' happy when I stepped on that scale this morning!  I was honestly hoping to maintain.  I'm not gonna pretend I didn't *know* what I was dealing with.  I know I've mentioned before - I weigh myself all the time...haha.  At one point this week, I was UP 5 pounds!  Not cool!

Anyway - I'm doing the happy dance!  After a few days without exercise and a little bit of being a sicky, I realized that this is normally where I may throw in the towel.  Not on purpose, but, the momentum slows, and actually going out to exercise turns into thinking about going out.......then to wishing I were going out, but I don't wanna....then to "Ohmygosh my pants are too tight!"  It's a week like this that you have to dig in a little deeper and act on those desires, think about how far you've come, and get busy! 

Last night I did my first C25K workout in just about a week!  Again, a little under the weather, so I didn't push myself TOO hard.  I stopped 1/2 way to stretch and then continued on.  I wanted to stop SO bad!  The last 2 minutes sucked so bad, because it was uphill.  I was determined, though.  I finished that run!!  That was all I was planning to do last night, BUT I ended up bumping into my walking buddy on her way out, so I turned around and walked all the way back around where I had just run!  Another 2+ miles!   Calories burned:  1001!  :)  AWE-SOME! :)  I felt great!

I'm so thankful for the success I'm experiencing!  I asked for God's help with this - and hey...He's been faithful!  :)  I know that He wants me to be healthy...and I'm pressing on to see this journey through.  I mean, why stop now?  He's given me this help - why be lazy and let the weight pile back on?  It'd be kinda like a slap in the face, right?!

Until next time!  :)

Join Me...

So ok, I have a skinny girl living inside me.  I promise I'm not schizophrenic.
You see, this skinny girl has been with me pretty much all my life.  She's been trapped inside this fat girl's body.  She's dying to come out.  Seriously.  I think if I don't let her come out now - she's going to kill me.  Either that or obesity will.  So, if I decide to stay the way I am, either way, I'm gonna die.

I have been overweight since about age 7.  I think I started to eat my feelings around that age.  My parents went through a pretty bad divorce, and my mom, my sister and I moved from North Carolina back to WV to live with my grandparents.  Ya know, I LOVE my Mamaw's cooking, but let's just say it's "down home."  It's great!  In no way, shape, or form do I really actually blame my weight problems on either of these factors.  Let's just say they didn't help any, ok?

I could rattle on and tell you story after story of how my weight has affected my life.  I could go on and on and tell you how much better my life would be if I had been thin.  Eh.  Honestly, I love my life.  Aside from weight, are there things I'd like to change?  Sure!  However, I serve an amazing God, I have an awesome husband, and wonderful family & friends.  I have a great life.  Weight has NOT affected these good things in my life!

Ok, I'm not going to lie, this isn't an incredibly well thought out blog.  It may NEVER be.  It is, however, going to document the skinny girl's journey to freedom.  Let me tell you a little bit about the skinny girl.  We're not well acquainted, but, I do know the girl has STYLE!  All my life, I have in some way wanted to be "fashionable."  Even though I LOVE me some Lane Bryant, sometimes it just doesn't hit the spot.  I would LOVE to be able to go into a store and pick out just about anything (within reason haha) and know that it's going to look good!  Again, I try to be fashionable now....and I feel like sometimes I succeed.  Other times I get frustrated and don't really care.  I've always tried to play up my good attributes.  I've always kept good care of my hair.  I just about always accessorize in some way.  I LOVE accessories!  Not this this blog is AT ALL about this - but, I'm in the beginning stages of starting a store on Etsy selling handmade accessories.  And more.  Maybe I'll tell you more about that at some point.

That was a long paragraph - and I don't really care to change it.  Instead of eating my feelings right now - I'm writing them! 

So, this is actually day 2 of skinny girl's journey to freedom.  I don't have EVERYTHING planned out yet.  I've been kind of gearing up to do this for a while.  On Sunday at church, our youth intern's message talked about the impossible things in our lives - and how they are ALL possible with God.  He asked us to write something "impossible" in our lives on an index card.  At the end of the message, he asked us to come and shred that index card.  Symbolizing the fact that it's NOT impossible.  Totally true.  I actually didn't go up and shred anything.....I wrote down my weight problem, but, didn't shred it because at the time, I thought, "Eh...I KNOW that this is NOT impossible for me (with God)."  I didn't think there was a need to symbolize it, because I knew.  Maybe I should have.  It's still in my purse.  I'll shred it tomorrow at work...haha.

The reason I know it's not impossible?  I've lost SO MANY pounds over the years.  In the last 5 years I've had 2 successful weight-loss attempts using the Weight Watchers plan.  It's a really good plan.  Between the attempts, I lost a total of 80 pounds.  That sounds massive.  It was.  Except that I've gained it all back.  My latest attempt was last summer.  I had my wedding coming up, and I wanted to look my best.  I lost 30 pounds.  I ran and I took my now sister-in-law's Turbo Kick class.  I ate right.  I was so on-track and was ready to keep going after the wedding.  Somehow, I lost sight of that.  Maybe it was the endless food on the honeymoon?  All-inclusive resorts are amazing.......but, man...watch out!  There's food EVERYWHERE!  Who knows?  That may have just set me off.....and I QUICKLY fell back into bad habits.  I have explored the possibility of my birth control causing *some* of it, and I have recently switched after my doc said that it was highly probable.  I've never gained 30 pounds in one year.....so it was a concern.  I've always been a gradual gainer, or a maintainer.

So, yesterday was really day one.  I decided to go out and walk on my lunch.  I went out in the 90+ degree heat and I walked for 50 minutes.  I went home...and maybe this was a little extreme, but I went out for day one of the Couch To 5K program.  For anyone interested - go to C25K.com  If you have an iPhone, there's a great app under that name.  Day 2 (today), not as extreme, but, I fired up a Turbo Kick DVD.  I used to be able to do that stuff pretty well, but man....I am OUT OF SHAPE!  I couldn't believe it....I had to stop and rest.  It kind of made me mad!

So, again I say - I don't have a plan, but I'm formulating it.  I may do the Weight Watchers plan on my own.  I don't dig the meetings so much.  Most I've gone to are boring and I don't find myself getting much out of them.  Maybe it's the leaders?  I don't know.  As of now, I'm really just trying to be more conscious of what I'm putting in my mouth and exercising.  After all, food moderation and exercise are key.  I don't care what plan you're on.  It all comes back to that.

Well, I know this has been a very rambly post, but stay tuned and as the pounds come off!   I'm not sure what will actually happen here, but I'm anxious to start.  I'll share some great recipes that I come across or "invent."  I'll share how I'm working out.  New foods I try.  I'll share my success and God forbid, failures. 

Thanks for reading and hopefully joining me.  I can't wait to introduce you to the skinny girl!